I have been thinking about this a lot today. Love and Loss….Is it better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all ? I think that answer is very clear to me today. With all my heart and soul I know that answer to be YES.
One of our beloved pets, our kitty Rosie passed away this morning rather suddenly. She became ill this weekend and in spite of the heroic efforts of our family friend and veterinarian Dr. Tim Wolf of the Mason Animal Hospital, Rosie could not hang on. I have been so sad today….in ways that have even surprised myself. I have always had pets, and always loved animals, but I thought I would be tougher knowing some day this would come, but in the end I am much more devastated than I can comprehend. It’s given me so much to think about.
My kids are sad…and I am sad. I asked myself did I do this to them/me…could I have spared our feelings? I don’t think so. What Rosie, and our other pets give and gave to us are so much bigger and more meaningful than the pain we feel today, and the pain we feel today is in direct correlation to how big we loved them. We loved you Rosie…in spite of you and I know in time the pain will pass and be replaced with all the warm memories.
Already today I feel your absence. Not a day went by that I didn’t scold you….”get off the counter” …. “get away from that door” ….”off my keyboard please you pain”…..always getting in the way…but that is how it was supposed to be I believe…and as I type I wonder where you are….you should be keeping me from completing the task at hand and raising my blood pressure.
Then there is the dog….daily Rosie would stand at the top of the steps and wait for Tucker to come on up…then proceeded to use his face as a punching bag…FUNNY…so funny! We would all laugh at the craziness!
and tonight especially I will wish you were there….jumping up and pushing my book with your head…then the crazy running hissing and barking ritual you and Tucker seemed to so each and every night for these past 6 or 7 years….He would wait for you to come to the threshold…Throw himself off the bed in your direction…you would quickly and deftly turn about and retreat in the other direction…running as fast as you could with a loud scretch meow and hiss….Tucker right behind growling and barking legs skidding on the hardwood floor our from under him….what a sight. Tucker will wait for you tonight Rosie…of that I am sure.
I wouldn’t trade this pain for a life without you. When you and Sophie came into our lives we taught the children several things….First we rescued you….you deserved a good loving home….we wouldn’t seperate you b/c families stay together right and you and sophie needed to be together….and care and compassion. The children loved you, played with you….laughed at and with you….got annoyed with you…and now mourn your loss. You enriched our lives in many ways and in time they wont remember the hurt, but the silly you and they will tell those stories.
You were part of our family, and we loved you. Like anyone in this crazy bunch we accepted and loved you in spite of your quirks…and Gosh we know you had them….It was your job to create a little havoc…to make me a little nuts…but underneath it all I know you loved us too.
We will miss you Rosie….may your heaven be abundant in cream and tuna…I hope you can frolic in the grass and chase the butterflies…because I know that will make you happy…and some day we will all be together again if you can wait, then you can pick up just where you left off…knocking Tucker in the face and sitting on my keyboard. Thank you for giving us your short life….I am so sorry that I could do more to keep you with us a while longer.
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